Monthly Archives: March 2016
There is peace in being fully present, mindful and grateful in the moment. And there is joy and exhilaration in feeling challenged and charged to pursue something new.
The real trick is to keep a balance between the two.
So often we feel the need to change because we think we “should.” But when we feel inclined to move forward because of a deep, soul-and-spirit level inspiration, that’s as good a reason as any to spread our wings.
We keep treating symptoms instead of causes. Money won’t change much if you don’t really know who you are and if you haven’t done the work to figure that out.
Money isn’t bad, by any stretch. Quite to the contrary, it can do a lot of good, flowing through the right hands. However, if the almighty dollar is your sole life or business motivation or only conceived solution for prettying your current reality, you are building a house of cards with no foundation. Tick tock.
I sure love being around creative people, and it was a treat to spend some time with Chad Price recently. Chad’s stories are a box of treasures for any aspiring songwriter!
In the fourth episode of the No Schedule Man Podcast, Chad and I discuss how he first discovered and tested his talent for writing and performing, who his major influences were, reaching out to Producer Bill Bell, recording his first full-length CD, “In This Dream” and his most recent single, “Honesty,” the songwriting process and what’s coming up in 2016 and beyond. Chad also does an acoustic rendition of a song that will be on his forthcoming new album, which he hopes to release some time later this year.
I actually used to believe that I’d eventually get to a point where I’d have things figured and we could all live happily ever after.
Now, I chuckle at the thought.
In reality, the more I think I know, the less I understand. And so the learning goes on.
I’ve never been happier.
So many of us go through life thinking we know what we want. But do we really?
When the routine changes, we want back to it. When we’re entrenched in the day-to-day, we want to get away. So which is it?
Has to be both.
Life will twist and turn whether we want it to or not. Embrace it. You can be present in each moment and still move forward.
Presence. Gratitude. Mindfulness. Try them out. Or … keep going through life always feeling like you should be somewhere else. Your choice.
In this episode, I catch up with Rose Cora Perry, who took part in my “Celebrating Hope” concert in November of 2010. Through the conversation, Rose discusses the origins, highs and lows of her first two bands (Her and Anti-Hero), the disappointment that followed their conclusions and the personal development that followed. Rose also talks about how her solo acoustic CD, “Off of the Pages” came to be and the personal and professional processes that have led her to where she is now, having put together a new band and nearing release of her latest project, “Onto the Floor.”
My youngest son had a busy weekend of hockey these past few days, on the ice four times in three days. I believe it fatigued all involved. Sunday’s game in particular got a little bit lively, more so than usual. The experience reminded me of just how easy it is to lose your perspective, and how much progress we’ve yet to make in responding versus reacting.
At that game, the parents from the other team were extremely vocal right from the start. And that’s fair enough. I can appreciate that they want to cheer for their kids. But those kids were also a little rougher out on the ice than what’s normal. There again, I experienced that as an anklebiter also. We used to call teams like that “chippy.” You learn to deal with it and move on.
Tasked with a tough job, the referees are usually selective as to whether to call penalties or not, particularly at this age. Unfortunately, they erred on the side of letting the kids sort it out themselves. In other words, there was a lot of hooking, holding and body contact, and the whistle wasn’t blowing. It escalated, and control of the game began to slip away. Or so it seemed.
As this happened, the kids continued to play, of course, under the supervision and “leadership” of the coaches, the referees, and the rest of the people in the arena (in other words, the parents). But the behaviour in the building quickly deteriorated to inappropriate levels. The energy rose, and tensions with it, and a number of people that I know to be very good, solid individuals, lost their cool and began shouting things which they almost immediately regretted. It was all unnecessary and uncomfortable.
Here’s the thing. As soon as the game was done, and the players came off the ice and sat down in the dressing room, helmets were removed to reveal … 9-year-old kids. And those kids, in my case, were the ones on the losing side of this particular game. But they were happy. The drama and anxiety was all being felt by the people who were projecting their expectations on to the event. But the participants, in this case, children, had not lost perspective. Sure, the game was “chippier” that it probably should have been. It would have been nice to have seen some leadership shown and order restored, but nobody got hurt. Overall, it was not really a big deal, and the kids knew it. But the coaches and parents were still wound up. Some apologized. The kids looked around like they didn’t know what the fuss was for. Meantime, many of the adults had allowed the uncomfortable energy to tell them things were not okay, and they had reacted. Poorly.
This phenomenon plays itself out over and over and over again in our society. People tend to react to a situation, rather than respond. When tension grows, your perspective narrows, and the “fight or flight” feelings kick in. It’s only later, when you’re calm enough to recognize the larger picture once again, that you realize the situation did not, in fact, merit the anxiety cast upon it.
How many times have you had a bad day at work, or have you received some unwelcome news and suddenly felt your world spinning out of control and all positive thought crashing down around you? What seemed so manageable, maybe even enjoyable, one moment, became unbearably bad the next.
What changed? The bad day at work? The news?
The refs at the hockey game?
The world didn’t fundamentally change in any of those cases. Only your choice of perspective did. Life is going to happen. It isn’t good or bad. It just is. It’s the perspective we choose – the choice we make – that tells us it’s positive or negative. But that’s our choice.
To react or to respond. That’s your choice. One involves taking a breath or two and giving the situation some space. The other does not.
The coach who yelled, “You’re ruining the f—king game” on Sunday for the benefit of a bunch of 9-year-olds is hurting himself a lot more than he may realize. Thankfully, it didn’t seem to be hurting the kids much.